For the past 24 days I've been trying to get all our ducks in a row about Justin's mom--figure out the next steps, set up whatever it is we can maybe set up, get SOMETHING done... and I've gotten no where.
Then, yesterday, we met with Pastor Brian (which I actually did set up), and apparently Justin's emotions caught up with his intellect. Tonight, I heard him outline the steps he has to take for everything--medical school, friends' weddings, his mother's impending death...
I finally realized that for 24 days I've been looking for Justin--the guy who always has everything so organized that we never run out of anything. Last squeeze of toothpaste? Just reach for the next box and put toothpaste on the shopping list. No more paper towel on the roll--no problem, it's stocked in the cabinet. Got bills? Paid early and more than the minimum--just check the spreadsheet he created for our finances. The guy I've been living with has been the baby deer stuck in the headlights next to the papa deer (Mark) who's really been paralyzed by the whole situation.
But now, suddenly, Justin is back! However painful the situation is, he has plans, he has ideas, he has presence.
Which is a good thing, because the situation is unfolding regardless of our degree of preparation.
Tomorrow we'll be in LA... having a meeting about hospice and Advanced Directive choices.