Then you sit somewhere with a compression in the middle of your chest radiating through your tightening lungs and squeezing your throat closed. Breathe shallow and off beat.
Like when you enter your empty apartment in the dark and sense something is different than when you left it in the morning.
Make blueberry pancakes for breakfast and eat with your husband, knowing you don't have to go to work in two hours, yet still feel your brain squishing in your head like a sponge being wrung out.
Try to vacation with palms too sweaty to open the sunscreen.