Thursday, May 29, 2008

Middle Age

When did this falling happen?

I used to look at middle aged women and think, "I'm never going to let my body do that. No sagging boobs, no protruding stomach that isn't the celebrity pregnancy bump--is she pregnant? the headlines read, no aches and pains and groans on rising from or lowering into a seated position."

Then one day I woke up and my stomach was practically lying beside me.

I look at the pictures of my cousin-so-young, and my college age friends and think, "I was that skinny once."

I look at the box of clothes from just-last-year and believe somehow that they will fit again.

Middle age: the time when if I stop going to the gym because boxing becomes a storage activity instead of a stress-relieving exercise, and I start eating anything I want, and maybe more because I'm not depressed so much and maybe because of the new medication, I suddenly weigh more and have bigger body parts, some of which look OKish with the proper outfit on, and some of which should ban me from board shorts forever.

Woe be to the take-out food that living in two apartments yet not having a functional kitchen because of the boxing...

My hope is that when Justin returns to work I'll start eating like me again--granola and yogurt are great breakfast, lunch, snack.... and three meals a day don't have to be eaten as though I may never get another chance to eat in my whole entire life.

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